Step 4 - The hope of recovery

“Recovery” has taken on a whole new meaning for me. A week ago life was normal. Then Gustav started a very steady march toward us. Our city was devastated. We haven’t experienced such devastation since Hurricane Camille – and I wasn’t around then so I’m taking that on faith. 60-70% of the area still doesn’t have power. “Recovery” means taking devastation and bringing life back to normal.

I evacuated before Gustav hit. I’ve been safe and comfortable, far from the heat and damage and lines for gas and food. I’m dreading going home and feeling guilty for being safe. And I have to go home to start recovery.

Suddenly I have gained a new insight into Recovery. As addicts, we tend to be fatalists. We feel we can never beat it. But I’ve come to believe that while there is life, there is hope. I’ve watched New Orleans crawl back from destruction to life. Now my city is beginning the recovery process. We didn’t have the death toll that New Orleans suffered three years ago. But as I’ve talked with my friends that I’ve finally been able to contact, I recognize the strained voices and the frustration and exhaustion that the situation has caused. But I also recognize that they are all alive and moving forward – hot and tired, but alive.

As addicts, we only lose when we give up. Until then, we are working toward recovery. We may stumble. We may lose our path. But unless we give up, we still have hope of recovery.

Step four is painful. Delving into the past; getting to the truth behind our addictions – it’s very much like cleaning away the debris and trees and torn roofs. But we can’t fix anything until we’ve done the clean-up.

Like my city, I am in recovery and I will continue there.